Are You Tired of Fighting?
Who Has Conflicts?
- Families and friends
- Church members
- Community members and neighbors
The results of fighting can be painful, divisive and result in permanent splits.
It doesn’t have to be this way. The Bible calls us to bring glory to God by living out the Gospel in our relationships.
…whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God (1 Corinthians 10:31).
Conflict is inevitable but in every conflict, there is an opportunity to glorify God, serve others, and grow to be more like Christ. Peacemaking can bring the prospect of hope for broken relationships.
Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called the children of God (Matthew 5:9).
We believe that the Bible provides us with the instructions and guidance for faith and life. The Peacemaking Ministry is based on scriptural principles rather than those of secular psychology or psychiatry.
The Peacemaking Team
The Peacemaking Team at TCC is made up of a group of mature Christians who have sensed God’s call on their lives to help the church on its journey towards developing a community of peace. They have a heart for reconciliation and a particular love and care for those who are experiencing the pain of conflict. Team members have gone through study and training in the peacemaking principles and regularly meet for purposes of continuing education and for discussing the spreading of the peacemaking principles through the church community.
The peacemaking team has a goal to contribute powerfully to the church’s mission, vision, and core values by promoting healthy relationships. The team does this by helping individuals through prayer support and one on one coaching and by instilling biblical peacemaking principles into the life of the church through ongoing teaching to groups within the church including:
- New members
- Life Groups
- Mission Teams
- Leadership Committees and Deacons
- Staff and volunteers
When dealing with conflict in your life, proactively educate yourself about biblical peacemaking and make every effort to work through conflict privately and directly with the other person. Let these foundational principles be your guide:
1. Go to Higher Ground – Glorify God (1 Cor 10:31)
Remember what is most important during a conflict
- See conflict as an opportunity to grow and serve others
- Live out your highest values and beliefs in the midst of conflict
- Christians should ask “How can I please and honor or God in this conflict?” and “How can I show the same love and mercy that God has shown me?”
2. Get Real About Yourself – Get the Log Out of Your Eye (Matt 7:3-5)
Take responsibility for your contribution to a conflict
- Focus first on your own attitudes, words and actions
- Check your heart for idols (The desires that turn into demands)
- Confess Humbly and thoroughly
3. Gently Engage Others – Gently Restore (Gal 6:1)
Help others see how they have contributed to a conflict
- Overlook minor offenses
- Go with an attitude of love and concern for the other person
- Talk privately first and then get help if necessary
4. Get Together on Lasting Solutions – Go and Be Reconciled (Matt 5:23-24)
Strengthen relationships through genuine reconciliation and agreement
- Look out for the interests of others
- Forgive the same way you have been forgiven by God
- Keep doing what is right, regardless of what the other person does
Adapted from The Peacemaker: A Biblical Guide to Resolving Personal Conflict, Ken Sande (Baker Books, 3d ed., 2003) © Peacemaker® Ministries. http://www.peacemaker.net
If you have any questions please feel free to contact the Peacemaking Team at TCC via email at firstname.lastname@example.org
You can find a wealth of biblical and practical information through the Peacemaker Ministries website: peacemaker.net
To learn more about how to resolve conflict in a biblically-faithful, gospel-centered way, please read or listen to one of the following resources on biblical conflict resolution:
- Resolving Everyday Conflict by Ken Sande
- The Peacemaker by Ken Sande
- Peacemaking for Families by Ken Sande
- The Young Peacemaker by Corlette Sande
- Peacemaking Women by Tara Klena Barthel & Judy Dabler